Dude, just walked by a homeless guy pissing on the sidewalk while he was screaming at his wang. God, I love this city.
i mean i'm ok with bufu but if i'm gonna do it it needs to be a mutual agreement, and there are steps that need to be taken. you don't just go OOPS we're doing it now
so he reminded me it was our 9 month anniversary and then said "we could've had a baby by now"
Either he masturbated at the end of the bed or she gave him a bj. Either way my bed was shaking and I was uninvolved.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
the cop cuffed us all with 40's still taped to our hands
He panicked, you ducked and I was coming off a 3 day coke binge. It was no one's shining moment.
He just told me he's been drinking vodka at work all day. I'm starting to believe in soul mates.
We're both on the slippery slope toward middle age...and really shame riddled bar experiences
So apparently the only parts of last night I remember didn't actually happen.. When did vodka become a hallucinogen?
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I can motorboat myself in this new push-up bra. I need to go out tonight.
Can't tonight. I'm supposed to get drugs for some college kids. Just doin my part in helping to enlight america's future
Welcome to stoned Saturday. Full of laser tag and beyonce and awesome
Figured out how to triple bathroom speed at #lollapalooza.. Girl squats, guy 1 goes between her, guy 2 uses urinal. Your welcome.
not sure what stings more, my ass or my pride...
Wtf is this place? I don't see any alcohol and I feel like we were supposed to bring our own strippers.
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