she lunged for my junk like it was the cure for swine flu
Dude if it is possible to orgasm from shitting i think it just happened.
Just saw a picture of your new tub, cant wait to pee in it
He came in, laid on our floor and started to make a snow angel.. On the floor. Then he just left never said a word. 20 mins later walked back in and dropped his pants, looked down and said "wow im happy i had boxers on."
The only reason we got away with streaking last time was cuz we had those miner hats
please tell me you're in jail and for some reason they have wifi
The milf did the body paint, come to the bar
Walking into the first day of college is like walking into a meat market. A meat market of sex.
Matt says that there are strip club auditions in our living room and he'd like you to audition.
Just had a flashback to Friday. Definitely had my hands in someone's bra. Definitely wasn't mine.
The drunk mom in a firefighter hat just told her to leave.
I don't know. What do people who don't get stoned do?
He yearns for your heart.
He needs to stop being a pussy about it.
I just screamed IM THE CHUPACABRA and jumped on his dick. I need to evaluate my life choices.
It figures that the only time one of my videos on Snapchat gets replayed is a video of my Hedonism Bot impression and NOT my nudes
Randomize
