Yeah, where have you been?
Clearly not facebooking enough. Sweet jesus.
quick I need to know all the foods that the very hungry caterpillar ate
drunk doesn't even begin to explain it. dude called him and said to bring you back because he'd already called dibs.
things I have learned from cosmo today- 40% of guys are uncircumsized, you can have a beer facial, and i really need to get tested for std's
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Finished my senior thesis. How am I celebrating you ask? By drinking gas station white zif out of an empty candle holder by myself. I fucking deserve to graduate.
Are you high?
The snorkel mask makes that pretty clear
Haha he puts me in a mood mix of annoyed and... "just get in my pants"
How would your parents feel if we installed a sex swing?
Did we smoke in a portapotty last night? And if so, do you think the brown stuff covering my body is actually dirt?
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I plan to get very, very drunk when I get off work.
But doesn't your shift end at like noon?
I don't think you understand.
The more I piece together last night the more I want to vomit it out of my brain.
Me and my liver are not on speaking terms.
I moved to this city Tuesday and got laid Saturday. Still got it.
Dude. Craziest ride ever. I was convinced that the bus was an airplane. There were clouds when I looked out the window. I got really upset every time the bus turned because airplanes shouldn't turn.
You’ll (maybe) appreciate that I picked at my ingrown hair again. Quarantine updates are getting BLEAK.
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