what happened last night??
everyone saw ******'s vagina
and that's just the beginning
He asked if it was my vagina. I told him it was my butt. Clearly I need to buy him a map of the female form.
i should have probably stopped drinking when my beer pong shots were hitting the other team in the face..
yeah thats usually a good indication.
We found her hiding in the bath tub.. And when i opened the curtain she replied "thank you" and walked out like nothing happened.
If you would give me the chance we might have the two separate pieces of the greatest fuck puzzle ever.
Drinking games this Saturday as usual although the ice cube tray game is banned due to last weeks incident
I went to look at my notes for my take home final and all I had written was 'you're on E. You won't remember a damn thing anyway.'
Fuckin wine wasted last night. Found my pants in the toilet this morning.
Definition of cool: he wants a back tattoo of three horses running through a "paisley explosion"
How did he even become this person? Like what drugs has he done??
Do you remember the bathroom attendant when he put out his hand for a tip and you gave him a high five?
I might volunteer to give breath samples on the 17th where I would be required to get drunk and then give samples! THE POLICE WOULD PAY ME AND PROVIDE THE ALCOHOL!
I hope I don't have to wait for another triple crown winner to get laid again.
THERE ARE NO EMOJIS TO SHOW MY SEXUAL FRUSTRATION
She started waving a nerf rifle around and demanding free booze.
We should get drunk in walmart
when?
20 minutes ago
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