Do you think this abandoned cigarette has herpes? cuz I'm tempted.
Preparing for thanksgiving at home now by chugging bourbon. Less than a month to train!
Found my phone laying in a snow angel outside my apt this morning.
I made out with Jen. We were naked. I'm still gay. Forever
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
I'm unshowered, and since I've seen this episode of say yes to the dress, I've decided to go to the store and get a frozen pizza at 10:20 am. I'm crushing life.
Katie told the cabby "when the boat docks I'm getting off with you"
I feel like when purchasing hard liquor on a Monday I also need to buy a happy 21st bday card to not seem so pathetic
I woke up with my name tag for work still on my shirt. It was a rough night.
I had wine for breakfast at 6am, that's how visiting my parents went.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
And also ice skating can blow me. Goodnight, love you!
I can't tell if my roommate is crying or having sex and the fact that there's anime in the background is only making this more confusing
I feel like I got run over by a steamroller made of cigarettes and booze driven by all of the men I've slept with.
Girl i am always here for you. But i am going to have sex now so im going to call you in the morning.
She's gonna be mad if she finds out you put weed in her house warming cookies
I'm at home, drunk, and I just called the guy I lost my virginity to and invited him to my wedding.. I've got to stop drinking by myself.
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