Apparently you walked through my house with your dress on your head
TIT CHECK! TIT CHECK! ALERT! ALERT!!!!
The project manager just came into talk to me for the first time and I had justed googled best drum solo ever and couldn't X out of the screen.
He said he had a gf but the monogamy was "only implied".
Just found a "how to get laid" book on the dresser and am now a victim of method number 16 corollary 7.
You yelled "hold my dick" before you tackled the guy away from the dj and two random girls moved to actually hold it, then argued about it. I want that whore aura!
thought the power was flickering out but it turns out im just blinking
You were buying shots for everyone, saying, "I got a tax refund. I'm a MILLIONAIRE."
All I could think when I saw it was, "All right, Vagina, only one of us is getting out of this alive."
its before 9am and ive already had to dip my dick and balls in a glass of milk. probably isnt a good sign for how today is going to go.
nothing out of the ordinary. you aplogized for having a spicy vagina and passed out
You kept whispering to me that the guy making your burrito was an angel.
I don't want to get pregnant doggy style. That's sad.
College is really paying off. I am gonna be a great teacher. I just made a grading sheet for weed. This shit got an A.
Finding my pants in the morning should not make me this proud
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