Dont worry, she is sitting right next to me. She is making it clear she wants to scissor
Pretty sure my dad just walked in on me jerking off watching guys on webcam. Remember how I used to say "most awkward day of my life?" I'm retiring that phrase.
The walk of shame is far, far worse on crutches.
Just so we both are on the same page, I have no solid plans as to where I'll be sleeping tonight.
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I woke up, not remembering how or when or why i was even there and looked over to find Steph spooning with an adult black man.
I've been here 20 minutes and some creepy old man told me he wanted to know what my insides felt like. I hate gay bars.
I just added 'steal mom's xanax' to my to do list for when I go home for Easter.
Idk, it's Grover wearing a sombrero. Do I need a reason?
I just had to ask my dad for money to pay for my birth control. I've hit financial rock bottom.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I was just compiling a top 5 blowjobs list and that's in there for sure.
My roommate was being an ass so I put everyone's drinks/shots on his tab for the entire night. Then when we left he was telling me how he got out cheaper than last time.
Opening beer with my teeth is getting easier the drunker I become.
It turns out my teeth are bleeding.
Ryan got so drunk he gave a hobo $20 and I had to zip tie him to the bed so he doesn't out stupid himself
Well, I just puked in the shower in case anyone wants an update on how my day is going
He told me he would make me come so hard I would throw up. I'm actually horrified that he thinks that's something any person would want
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