just saw a guy try to order booze in his coffee at 8 am.
The size of her hoop earrings are directly related to how much of a slut she is.
I just used my thong as a hair tie. I think I reached my limit.
I'm glad you trust me to be your sex stat keeper.
She came to college a virgin and left on court order. We ruined her.
i'm just sitting here going through her tagged pics, covering up different parts of her face to try and figure out exactly what it is that makes her so ugly.
All i want to do is drink fuck and cry... you dont have to cater all three its more like the saddest choose your own adventure ever
Eating an ice cream sandwich while your little bro gets me weed. May I adopt him?
Honest opinion...too aggressive to bring the funnel out to the bar? Also just so you know im at the bar. with the funnel.
After the apocalypse all we'll have is vodka and twinkles.
I made my uber driver take a pit stop between clubs so we could restock on Xanax. #priorities
She's going to jail in a few weeks but she just got a boyfriend. Yet I'm still single as fuck.
Seriously, I really just burned my nipple making ravioli.. I'd explain, but no reasoning makes this acceptable:/
I have a whole new respect for her. She chugged half a bottle of jack daniels, and then peed all over his wall. Serves him right.
Granted, I did not plan to spend ANY hour of the last day of 2020 sober.
Randomize
