just caught my little brother jacking off the family pet
I love sluts.
I end my prayers with that every single night.
the guy in front of me just bought a pound of bacon, a bouquet, and a case of budlight, i want to see THAT makeup sex
he was walking around the bar drinking wild turkey and gobbling simultaneously
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
What a good family we'd make, him and I and our kids and his good dick.
I'll sleep on the bed... The couch is now designated banging area. Any banging performed outside of that area will be subject to fines of cleaning up stains.
I figured out why I insisted on leaving my sweater on the ground outside. I smelled it and I'm 97% sure I peed on it last night
Lesson of the night- sweaty dick can get stuck to ice, and require medical attention.
So we reenacted men's olympic skeet shooting using roman candles and flattened beer cans. That's all
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I do believe that seeing camel toe in leopard print pants at Walmart is the closest I will ever come to going on a safari
THIS IS NOT A DECISION I MADE AT ONE IN THE MORNING IM JUST GETTING AROUND TO TELLING YOU ABOUT IT NOW
We have a shopping cart in our front lawn. Also Mickey D's breakfast?
Fuck you and your widespread penis snapchat
It's the kinda thing that makes you wanna buy a rainbow flag and fight republicans and kiss girls
Do I have to cook for the potluck? Can I just bring a costco size bottle of Vodka?
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