I thought all girls wanted is to get a boner
you want to re-phrase that?
just printed 333 ways to get kicked out of wal-mart. hello thursday night.
i can barely draw a stick figure let alone shave a heart into my pubes
they bet me shots that I couldn't give people piggyback rides around the club just cause I'm 125lbs and a girl...I had a line forming after the third guy.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Just threw up in the waiting room. I can't believe I have to switch dermatologists again.
mallory made a planned parenthood decision maker flow chart again.
I have discovered that there is nothing that a giant penis attached to a southern accent can't talk me into. yee-haw!
I'm worried my skin won't stretch enough to handle this boner. Then what?
Seriously, I am going to crawl in a hole, sew my vagina shut, and spit acid on any man that comes near me.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Today's walk of shame includes last nights hair and make up, an 8 hour shift, me leading a meeting and me throwing up in a parking lot on my way to work. Dear world, you're welcome.
And that facial hair. He might as well shave it so it spells "douche" on one cheek and "nozzle" on the other.
I don't need my coworkers thinking I'm a nutcase.
You gift wrapped a tampon.
Sorry you felt insulted last night let me rub your butt in remorse
Just broke into the basement of my house via my american red cross blood donor card. I officially save lives
Well, I was giving him a handy and I sighed in boredom. He heard. I had to fake moaning sounds after he asked if I sighed.
Randomize