Sooo i definitely have a major burn on my chin from kenny's ...stubble from making out for hours while coked up. Pure class.
Psycho is an understatement. U were running around the house screaming IM UNDER THE IMPERIOUS CURSE
he asked me out through an event invitation on facebook, the title read Romantic Dinner For 2
Our adventure is going to pick up his pipe and weed that he ditched when he got pulled over the other day.
HOT DATE.
mowing the lawn. still drunk. If my dad doesn't appreciate this I swear I'm dissowning everyone including him
I think when she wakes up, she'll either kill me, or laugh. I hope she laughs.
I STRONGLY considered not bringing that guy home with me last night simply because I'd JUST changed my sheets that morning.
I made out with a bride-to-be last night at the bar. Jesus died for our sins right?
of course! give me a few hours to recover from chugging a 4loko out of a frisbee, and it will be rage time yet again
If I can't get slightly excited by the thought of his face between my legs then I know I can never sleep with him.
Dude are you wearing a trashbag right now?....
I seemed to have misplaced my pants...
AFTER I licked the bald guys head they told me we weren't playing
Well yes he stayed. He brought Guiness, them he shaved me. It's a long, but beautiful story.
Your pictures have evolved a lot over the years but I think your angry dick pic phase was one of my favorites
THERE HAS BEEN GRANDTHEFT IN THE HOUSE. SOMEONE STOLE THE BABYWIPES AND YOU NEED TO BUY MORE BEFORE WE LET YOU IN. oh and you have to take two shots before we'll let you in. with no chaser.
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