i don't like sucking hair
Goodnight sugar queer
Sugar queer??
Why does my predictive text prioritize 'queer' over 'puffs'?
so now she's a stripper
can't say i'm surprised
Skipped a towel and decided to spit the cum into his face. I now owe him new contacts.
and im sitting here waiting for them to work on my car. in a room full of men. that are too old for me. its like a sausage fest nightmare...
I feel like vodka or no vodka, you'd still be trying to button your cat into your comforter
Just had a memory of you pretending to be a begging dog putting your head on my lap while I fed you. Great night to try a new drug.
Breaking up as roommates was a poor life decision. I'm sorry. Thank you for never shitting on the floor.
Boob shaped ice luge is ordered for my bday. Boom
I can't even drink.
The liquor comes out the nipples. Out. The. Nipples.
I had a sex dream. With two guys. And my subconscious decided to put your dick on BOTH OF THEM. If there is a society where that does not mean "I cherish you" I do not want to live there.
If, when you wake up, you're wondering why you're in the bathtub, it's because when I tried to move you, you yelled that that was cheating and tried to kick me in the face.
Fair enough.
The other day I was really high and I felt like my words were coming out of my mouth in flowers...I don't know.
I feel like my body was put in a dryer with rocks set on permanent press.
Standing naked in my kitchen making nachos. I love my youth.
dude I fucking saw you snort tequila
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