You think ghandi was good in the sack? cuz i sure do.
I'm not gay.
Soooo you want ghandi? is that what your telling me?
If ghandi gives good head...I'm in
Its fine.
eh.. i should've known it was headed downhill after he used the phrase "pussy sundae"
she just sneezed while going down on me. is it rude for me to ask her to do it again?
Do you think the new Crest Whitestrips Advance Seal would stay on while I give him head? It would be great to knock out 2 things at once...
smoking weed is really the only logical conclusion to hangovers
This is random, but did i give u a handjob in the middle of the night or was that a dream?
She just sat there, all alone, with a bottle of booze. And the dog. He even looked like he didn't wanna be there with her.
It was pretty bad. Like cum-on-my-face-while-singing-Let-It-Snow bad.
i woke up to something itchy on my head. it was his mustache. he fell asleep face-plant style on the side of my head. WTF?
I'm going to make "gut the love salmon" a common slang term for sex. Spread the word.
I cnant read. Cheetos goen. Help. Grt Cheetos.
PUB CRAWL IS THE WEEK I COME BACK FROM NOLA OMG OMG OMG. Has it been a year already since I tried to make out with you and you let a bar tender take a shot out of your cleavage? Time flies.
I was carrying around a bottle of Jameson yelling rescue me
30% sure Kevin and I just adopted a cat. Talk to me when the sun's up but I really feel like that's a thing.
It was probably the most embarrassing moment of my life. But I had cleavage, so I'm good!
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