I took shrooms, thc and molly but its okay i'm surrounded by freaks
I'm sorry I'm just not ready to become vampire yet
WE WERE REALLY IN A PORNO LAST NIGHT
Watching intervention at a bar. Who let this happen??
some people offered us free beer as long as we shotgunned it and after you shotgunned four without pausing they took their offer back
He is making me drink his THC water out of a milk jug.
Just got a blow job while taking my online quiz. How is life in the dorms treating you?
I swear to Christ if it turns out to be an intervention, i will set you on fire.
You are the tramp this city needs, but not the one it deserves.
He FaceTimed me fucking his new girlfriend. He was wearing a banana costume.
Ya know, one would think a restraining order would keep me from fucking my ex.
One of my favorite March activities is cropdusting people while wearing a kilt.
Don’t fucking talk to that dude from monday!! Ethical consumption dude, don’t fuck shitty guys
She's kind of holyer-than-thou, like god himself came down and said "please cock block your roommate at every opportunity, and if you think she's thinking of sex, tell her she's a whore"
THIS IS WHAT CELL PHONES ARE FOR! So you can tell me that you're bringing your coworker who lives in the "Halleleuia community" home for a beer SO I'M NOT DRESSED IN LEATHER LINGERIE WHEN HE WALKS IN THE FUCKING DOOR!!
Randomize
