its like his balls were made of silver and he was trying to polish the tarnish off
I like how she turned her beer into a wet t-shirt contest
I am currently prioritizing my hw by splitting into things i can and things i cant do drunk. Oh college
I wish i could tell a story about guys I know without the phrase "and then I blew him." coming up.
you were mad bc i took longer then 2 minutes to finish
I may have a concussion but the symptoms are the same as a hangover so I can't tell. Best 21st ever.
dude, i have to cancel tonight, my neighbor just bought a goat
woke up with the bag of wine duct taped to my shoulder.
We have sex, then we talk about foreign policy. Its a win-win.
No, I did not fuck him for football tickets. I fucked him for tickets to the superbowl. I'm not that much of a slut.
I still have a scar from the last time she gave me a handjob. There is NO WAY i'll stick my dick anywhere near her again
Easy. Go to walmart, buy a bag of charcoal. everyone gets a present and it's cheap.
He put on star wars porn, i thought it was hilarious last night but now i'm wondering why he has star wars porn
Right after i got done cumming i sat back and gave a big Ric Flair "WOOOOOO!"
Too high to wash a dish but just high enough for a kitchen fire
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