Making my coffee at work this morning let out a jack daniels fark. Turn around and see the quiet guy making his breakfast
Michelle and I recorded her bunny humping it's little rubber black ball.
Just passed a strip club with a Marquis sign that said 'tis the squeezin'
Hold on im havin a staring contest with my cat
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
I think I'm making progress on my commitment issues. I drunk made out with the same guy from last semester this weekend.
and on the second day it was tequilla tuesday. and the lord saw it was good.
I JUST MET THE GIANT MAN THAT WILL CARRY ME FROM PLACE TO PLACE
First highlight of the semester: campus safety caught me peeing in the dirt parking lot by kappa. Then as they were about to write me up, they recognized me, laughed, and left.
I just want to nap and funnel a bottle of wine in a cute dress
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
We popped the air mattress last night via sex and we just kept going but it feels like I have a bruise on every vertebrae
There's just no proper way to thank a man for that many consecutive orgasims.
I've covered myself in body paint in the likeness of R2D2 and I still didn't get laid. Please explain.
This is the third time this month a guy I’m not dating has dumped me. How is this even possible???
So I ended the trip with two cold sores, poison ivy on my leg and vagina, and no alcohol or weed. WORST. 4TH. OF. JULY. EVER.
I found my parents stash of sex toys. You know my green one? My mom has it...in purple. I HAVE THE SAME VIBRATOR AS MY MOTHER
Randomize