I dumped him because he's never seen star wars. I'm certain I did the right thing.
we sang "a whole new world" together. either he's my gay best friend or the love of my life.
Oddly enough when I decided to stop whoreing myself out... I lost most of my companionship.
i am pretty sure she ate my hamster last night. i am thinking this because she left me a note that says she ate my hamster and my hamster is no longer in its hamster cage.
Remember the time we were in the hospital and I wanted to steel the arm restraints and use them as sex toys?? Oh college memories....
There are parrots here and they're headbanging to the music. There's also a clown and a pit bull that can jump onto tables. Too high for this shit.
I was short on money so I let my roommate mase me for $60
Thats not what we're looking for. I want this kid to suck a lolly pop out of a stripper's snatch.
WE'RE FINALLY ADMITTING THAT WE DESPERATELY WANT TO SCREW EACH OTHER. THIS IS WHAT PROGRESS FEELS
He managed to crash an entire train of shopping carts into a wall. I think he noticed my implants.
I suppose what I've learned from this experience is that sometimes you just have to make out with a narcissistic baby daddy to make a clean getaway.
So I pass out narcotics if its a girl?
Drunk within and hour of coming home from work, merry christmas bitch
You went into my bathroom put on my bathrobe.. Said excuse me then went in my front yard and started yelling who ate my whopper..
well, i found him passed out on a picnic table two miles away with a lit cig in his hand...he had a rough night
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