no, he came in my armpit
I swear coke makes your nose hairs grow out of control
4 words: hood of his car
She's the rare girl who loses weight and gets uglier.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
And if it was a miscarriage you should figure out whose it was. He must be an alphamale for his offspring to sustain life this long in the amusement park that is your body
If you like her enough, bring her with. If not, eloquently cunt punt that bitch through the field goals of life.
Pissed along side the highway while waving at all the traffic... if thats not a sign of a productive night to come then idk what is
My tuesday consisted of speaking to a federal agent for two hours and watching a roving band of gypsies jump over a fire until 2:30am
Ask me who hasn't showered since Sunday and just got cruised at the gas station on his way to work. I'm a terrible gay.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Let's just says his mouth writes a lot of checks that his penis just can't cash. Don't waste your time.
Idk you're asking me for advice on dating bro, after I told you I got a convicts number today.
You know how it is. Tell me not to do somebody and suddenly I wanna.
Keep two things coming: nudes and puppy pictures
He screamed, "Let there be light!" when he came
I’m turning 34 on Friday and I feel like the only thing I’ve accomplished in life so far is getting into pissing matches with clients
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