Skipping work because i'm still too drunk from last night still. got home at midnight and passed out in front of my door for 2 hours bc i couldn't find my key
had to call my rooommate to let us in. Passed out in my dress and found the key on my hair tie-in my hair- just now.
Well, she opened the door to puke outside the car, but she threw it open so hard it popped back and hit her in the face.
So if a 2 is a 10 on the road... do we consider college to be "on the road?" help. its urgent.
I'm currently looking on facebook to see how slutty the girls from my kindergarden class are now. I have a problem.
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I've literally never felt worse
My body feels like its decomposing
you kept saying how you wanted to mainline bacardi right into your bloodstream. medical school is doing wonderful things to your brain
He was dressed as the 420 Easter bunny...he looked like a walking anti-drug campaign.
I can still taste the Jäger. I'm gonna shoot myself.
Now everytime I sit on a toilet I think about having sex with him. Great.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
First time a guy goes down on me and his dog had its head on my knee the whole time. I swear it was judging me.
Drinking and decided to streak in the apartment fountain. Canadian goose shit and sharp rocks on the bottom. I sobered up quick. That was a very bad idea.
She drunkenly texted me about Japanese mythology at four AM. I think I’m in love.
I realized my soar muscles form the shape of me leaning over a toilet
Ignore him I am the one that wears the pants in the relationship while "the big man" cries in bed
If the people you’re with use the word tequila in a sentence with phrases like hair of the dog or breakfast of champions...run awsy
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