I found a pair of size 15 female undies on my floor?? is that big?
Dear man in the lobby please go play whith yourself elsewhere
Just met a guy who has been in college for 7 years and still classified as a junior. Then watched him shotgun 10 beers. Found my new hero
This is going to be another afternoon spent getting drunk in the shower, isn't it?
ugh... I can't wait for campus to get back. Then everyone will have other things to try to have sex with besides me.
besides i was ending his dry spell. it's written in the bible that jesus likes that right?
by the end of the night two people were passed out at the table, three on the couches, and one in the bathroom. it looked like someone pumped sleeping gas into the middle of a dinner party.
Before I left he insisted on serenading me with a ukalele. I might be a little bit in love
She's comparing the feel of breasts to shredded cabbage. Weirdest. Grandmother. Ever.
No it's only my right leg that feels like it's about to fall off. The left is fine.
Well I walked the wrong way for a little bit and I don't remember if I fell asleep or not but I definitely laid down under the over pass for a while
We made a pact to go to the nursing home together... that way we could stay high till the bitter end. Do you not remember?
How to not get laid: tell him he reminds you of your brother. While having sex. Thanks, vodka.
ya I had reallllllly good sex last night too that will probably get me evicted
ABOUT TO MAKE THE BIGGEST MISTAKE OF MY LIFE, SEND HELP
Have fun and good luck.
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