He just posted pic of sad weiner and half a butt cheek. That is it. I HATE online dating.
I only want to screw him when I'm drunk. Problem is I try to be drunk as often as possible
No one intentionally makes bad decisions, just errors in judgement. You have your boyfriend I have a restraining order from universal studios. It's all relative
You know when the three of us hug it out in the alcohol isle in walmart it's gonna be fun.
there is no amount of schooling that prepares you for when your morbidly obese 45 year old patient tells you she has her clit pierced.
All I remember is lecturing my dog about how she's a lucky bitch to have a structured eating and shitting schedule.
He told me he wanted to show me something beautiful, then just started peeing off the bridge into oncoming traffic
Woke up shivering behind the titty bar, With the worst leg cramps. I'm like a poster boy for responsibility.
The nausea has returned and I can't handle such things to exit my body so violently
I have a breathe right strip stuck to my forehead, several inexplicable bruises and I think someone tried to paint my nails with glue, but I still have my Santa hat. I'm gonna call this one a success.
I faked more orgasms with him then ever should be allowed for someone this pretty.
Update. A gay dude just told me I'm the most beautiful thing with a vagina he as ever seen. How should I feel about this?
You know Sunday Funday was a success when 'puke and rally' came at lunchtime on Monday.
Shriek
Apparently the guy with the moaning gf that lives above us is in my DES class... AWKWARD
They got skeletons in the booths to enforce social distancing.
Thought they were weekend at berniesing that shit at first.
Randomize
