My first STD was from a foam party
There is a strange man mowing my lawn. Best day ever.
how bad would it be if i made his twitter my home page?
Dude. He drives a mini. Therefore he's a virgin
Congrats on having the best tasting nipple at the bar last night.
Hey fuck you and your taint. I'm just riding a canoe called life, back the fuck off. P.s. I need a ride
Dude, this is like the 4th time today I've had to use cruise control for a 25mph zone. This hangover is never fucking gonna end.
Halfway through he got an idea for a short story so he wrote it in magic marker on my boobs. Yeah, he's a keeper.
five cans of playdoh and a game of guess whose penis ...
Lets go hit some boners bro!
I appreciate the acceptance and inclusion, but that's not how we gay men talk.
😂😂😂 what are we doing to these poor guys?!
Maintaining the status quo.
Would it be creepy if I masturbated with my face in the pillow he slept on last night? Cuz I'm pretty sure that's about to happen
as a self proclaimed hoe im ok with a lotta things but that is not fucking one of them
So, I just found out Ireland, is #1 in binge drinking. I know its Sunday but this one is for America.
i buy too many watermelons when I'm drunk
Randomize
