We need to have an Itty-Bitty Titty Committee mtg somewhere in the range of 5 minutes to ASAP.
At the hair cuttery. A father here with his daughter just answered his phone "ken's whorehouse"...Now I remember why I used to pay more for haircuts.
His housemate was playing a sad violin solo for me on my way out. God I hate musicians.
Oddly enough when I decided to stop whoreing myself out... I lost most of my companionship.
You came back with four clearly unattractive women and wanted to throw a dance party in my room.
i took my sailor hat off and used it as a vom bucket
Next time he asks to wax your nipple while you're passed out I promise I'll be sober enough to intervene.
We walked in and someone handed her an unopened bottle of jack with her name on it. She's like a drunken celebrity.
If your gig isn't over in 30 minutes I am coming on that stage to come on your dick.
I just want to sing to him and rub baby oil on his head
Oh my fucking god that cat looks just like you after you accidentally took Ketamine
A+ Viking dick
I bet your mom's never met a girl who's thrown up at the presidential inauguration before though.
There's literally not a single picture of him with a shirt on. I can't talk to him without dislocating my eye balls.
Bank just called....we left my debit card in the ATM last night.
Randomize
