I just gave some chick my debit card to put in the jukebox. She better put out.
there was this guy running across campus barefoot in the pouring rain stepping in all the puddles. i want his life. and i want to be stripper.
Dave a horae rider a coqw boy
I smoked a bowl while he ate me out, you need to change your major to match making asap. You are a guru of love.
Midnight run for medical supplies ended several hours later with a lapdance to the Braveheart soundtrack.
Just thought i'd let you guys know that my dad was roofied at a lesbian bar last night...
I say go for the trifecta and maybe you'll get a medal or something. Or a baby. That's like the same thing right?
Man...I want to get monumentally fucked tonight.
Ladies and gentlemen, the only person I know who would keg stand in pearls and a bow.
Cleaning naked can be dangerous. Vacuum cord got stuck on my belly button ring...
This really high kid past out in the corner of the room holding a box of cheez its in his arm. My idol.
Stole my 7th stop sign and 3rd speed limit sign last night. Not even sure how because they were bolted to a cement wall. Tequila gives you strength you didn't know you had.
Sex while Star Warsing is the best
You probably shouldn't do that...but if you do take pictures
They got skeletons in the booths to enforce social distancing.
Thought they were weekend at berniesing that shit at first.
Randomize
