this is like her 8th guy since december, is she wasn't frumpy people would call her a whore
We have to go find her fucking car. She came home from a 80 dollar cab ride, no shoes, and all she remembers is its at a burger king on a street with an H in it
Don't ask how, but I'm pretty sure my name is now on a lease to a taco bell franchise in maryland...
her boyfriend dumped her for my exgirlfriend. so filming our hookup is pretty much a definite.
Just so everyone's clear, it was already on fire when I got there.
Even her dad came up for the body shots. Wasn't sure what to do so I just laid there and let it happen...
You should have seen her, she looked like a skinny Jabba The Hutt
That literally makes no sense
Exactly
Explain it like you would if you were talking to a 5 yo
Wait no, like you would to a stoned high school freshman.
I just puked behind a tree outside work, then walked past my manager with puke in my hair. Man, I'm gonna miss this when I get a real job.
Her one night stand followed us to mass. This is too funny for real life.
There's nothing quite like having a little 8 year old boy hand me a Bible on campus while I'm on my way to the health center because of my recent slutty tendencies.
FINALLY GOT MY TENTH DICK. PARTY FOREVER
He and I didn't so much date, as watch cartoons and go down on each other.
Is it bad when I wake up sore & don't know if my injuries are from sex or the mechanical bull at the bar?
I told him I was going outside to throw up and I ended up passing out in the front yard in my underwear for 45 minutes. When I walked back inside he said "where have u been?". My husband ladies and gentlemen
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