I'm talking handstands, sex in broad daylight, waking me up in the middle of the night. CRAZY
handstands? WTF?
she was a gymnast
go to hell.
Exactly how deep of a burn should you have when you pee before becoming legitimately concerned?
The only thing I have to prove last night happened is a fireman's hat full of puke.
I was to drunk to drive all the way up there, so we just had rough phone sex instead
I don't know what you're talking about. I just drank beer out of my own bellybutton by doing a backbend and letting it run down my body.
She drove all the way from Austin to have sex with me. I think it's a safe assumption my dick will have an easy life in college.
We're pregaming our midterms. Also, when we get our tests back, we're taking a shot for every point we lost. If you're not in, you should just go ahead and transfer.
I vaguely remember stopping for a bag of bugles and some lube and then I woke up this morning with melted chocolate on my hands. I think I love him
Please assure him that the flying penis statue is for display purposes only.
Seriously??? You send me boob shots with your husband and kids in them???
A good drinking club with a running problem, improves endurance in both I have observed this evening.
2 for 1 beer results in multiples of 2 so what should be a beer or two becomes 4 or 6. But running, alleviates the need for a DD.
We broke into the kitchen, stole cooking aprons, and wore them on the dance floor.
Bringing my mom Taco Bell and weed. I'm such a good daughter
Is someone on their way here yet? I'm way too tweaked to be here alone
I know... It's stupid... It's like, I have sex with his brother and bestfriend ONE time....
Randomize
