sorry about last night, sometimes people just get drunk and have sex witht heir friends
I know, I was there.
I spent a large portion of the night trying unsuccessfully to keep hayley (who was wearing a dress and no underwear) from doing handstands, but yea it was fun. the boys had fun
Hey, 'thunder cock' as proud as I am for you getting laid, could you put a muzzle on her? I have to be up at 5, thanks.
Once two people had broken bones it had become a bulk hospital trip so we took the party bus
Is it hot in here? Is the room moving? Its moving. The room is moving. Its spinning like a top. Have you ever been covered in puke? What are you doing?
It took years to rebuild my brains forcefield against your charm and I feel like u seal team 6'd ur way in again and caught my common sense sleeping on post
He's a forty-something balding gay man with no boundaries or sense of social norms. Of course we should befriend him.
Weirdest drunk sex ever. His sweat dripped into my eyeball and then he looked down and asked me why I was crying. I went with it.
So vagazzling was a success
You added his wife on Facebook?! You're horrible at this mistress thing
I have "if found please return to" written in sharpie on my arm, my uterus is rejecting everything, and I have hickies. I must actually be an 18 year old piece of shit girl instead of a responsible 23 year old
Its like my group of friends and I are all dating and we're all just a bunch of Swingers, is that normal?
Last 4 google searches: class c felony, scary ghosts, peanut butter jelly time, Lindsey lohans vagina
He is saved in her phone as Sir. Mindfuck <3/ vag cleaner of course I need to meet him.
Why is there a pair of panties on my front lawn?
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