I wanna passion pit in your ass
It really wasent that hard. The male one had a M and the woman one had a W. I just couldent comprehend that at the time.
hey remember that time we got really drunk, you tried to find narnia in my refrigerator and passed out in the freezer drawer??
no.
you announced to everyone at the bar "fuck girls. they're confusing. im gonna start having sex with boys now"
just had to take a 4 hour nap to write a one page paper. its obviously the week after winter break.
apparently i was just sitting there with my shirt down holding my boobs saying "its ok. its all gonna be ok"
He cut part of his finger off. It was a consolation blow job.
It was like the perfect storm of bad decisions.
thank you whoever used my nalgene as a flask. pregamin in chem
That's the point dumbass, I can't use my boss as a reference cause they'd have to fucking call him in prison.
We may not see eye-to-eye on much, but I'm definitely willing to let you see eye-to-vagina again.
I mean we don't talk anymore but I still see him around wearing that sweater he stole from me after we had sex
I LACK THE NECESSARY BRAIN FUNCTIONS TO BE ABLE TO PROPERLY RESPOND TO THAT
True life: I got so drunk that i took a shower with my clothes on at 4 am...
Ik youre sleeping but fyi its 5:32am I'm sitting in the middle of the road bra less and shoeless with boxers in my hand and no ride. Shits real crazy.
Randomize
