The pink midgets playing hockey is the EXACT reason cold meds and alcohol do not mix. Period.
You'll be the first to get a "it's herpes simplex 1" cigar.
some kid came into the principals office and tried to explain what he was sent there for through interpretive dance.
I'm not saying I want a booty call. I just want what Cory and Topanga had.
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Coffee flavored vodka sounded like such a good idea at the time. Now i never want to drink coffee again.
Hey man, did I leave the bottom drawer to my refrigerator that I had beer in at your house by any chance?
But why is there no point in liking him? Does he have herpes? Is he married? Is he gay? Did he get his penis chopped off in a freak accident? If the answer is no to all of the above, then he is fair game
All she said was "the usual?" and unzipped my pants.
literally the only thing you kept saying was "i wish i had a beer keg vending machine that accepted hugs as payment" and everytime you said it you rubbed the urn her grandmother's remains were in
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So just to get a feel for things...how prone are you to male Amish strippers...
She's the one that asked you what my favorite color was & handed you a piece of bacon
He leaned over in the middle of the movie and said "My dick's name is Juan". WHO DOES THAT?
I was talking about you wanting my dick, but that works too
Could you imagine living in a city where bartenders are available by 1:30 AM
I'd have like 4 kids by now and at least one std
Well shove his head down there and tell him not to stop til we have a new president!