At least make sure they are 18
i'm pretty sure you said "blowjob marathon" lastnight
i totally said that
grilled cheese. we just shotgunned grilled cheese.
I just did the nutritional comparison between 2% milk and Bud Light Lime.. the beer had less calories, less carbs, and less fat. It's not looking good for milk in my life anymore
These 33 Eskimo Brothers Boinked The Same Person And Couldn’t Be More Proud
my mom said i couldn't bring cigarettes cause it was a family trip, which was really irresponsible of her because now i have to walk around the beach drunk trying to find someone with cigarettes.
I just woke up to find the whole kitchen sick had been converted into a gravity bong.
The strip club called, they have your shoe.
I want to get my vag crammed with complete loss of every bit of dignity I have left by this man from every angle on every flat surface that exists. That is all.
Pants-less sunday? Also I'm high and independence day is making me cry
im coming over
17 Inappropriate Things People Did With Instruments
I am honored my friend, to hold the decision of what enters your body
Oh shit. My drunken car sex is on Google Earth.
He almost got to me tonight but then I was like fuck it I'm going to dance with a teli-tubby on the bar so fuck you
I told her to to let go of her rationtal thoughts and just enjoy the fact that i was going down on her till she passed out from sheer orgasmic pleasure.
This guy on tinder just told me that he wanted to tie me up and asked me what I thought. I told him I wanted tacos
Definitely ended up doing Coke with Chewbacca in the porta potty behind the haunted house.