She has more profile pics than tagged pics. narcissism at its best.
i really wish i had a remote for my computer. its all the way on my bed while im across the hall puking my brains out to enya. not cool.
I hope this doesn't change things. I feel that me being a minor made it more exciting.
Need a travel agent to tell me which countries in Asia have legalized prostitution for New Year. Fireworks would be cool too.
Last night he asked the cab driver "if you were in the middle of getting tattooed and the tattoo artist suddenly got a boner would you leave or would you get that boner??"
Would you even take no as an answer? I have a feeling you see it more as a challenge.
We got caught having sex in the bathroom by my professor. In accordance with tradition, we still brofisted. I think my grade went up considerably.
You were cuddling with an eight iron and I was eating a fajita completely ignoring your presence.
I can hear my family downstairs singing Christmas carols as I masturbate
I don't want sex or anything I just really need someone to appreciate how shiny my hair is
You kept hiding under tables and grabbing people's legs and shouting SHARK ATTACK.
It's the kind of dick you travel across the country for
only i would get off to receiving death threats online
When your grandma invites you to a sweet girls' Valentine's dinner with your mom and sister, but you have to decline because you're trying to get two dudes to rail you at once...
Probably going to live on vodka sodas and fireball shots
Randomize
