in the car goin home for fam dinner and he is silent... i think he realized how big of a whore his little sister is
i wanted a birthday blowjob. not a birthday VD.
do you think women who transgender themselves have the option of getting a circumcised or an uncircumcised dick?
I love having hate sex.
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This girl can open a bottle without using her hands and she's 21. She meets my standards
The dentist told me I have super glue on my teeth. I'm not blaming you I just want to know how that happened
There are paw prints all over my ceiling.
We looked at pictures of a Texas banjo contest from 2006 for a half hour and then were surprised by who won. That stoned.
Highlight of the night was you walking into the men's room yelling "My husband is diabetic" and crawling under the stall to yell at me.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I like to take my ritalin one pill at a time with each pill spaced out a couple minutes so I feel like I'm going super saiyan when they kick in.
You tried to impress her by kicking the 5th floor button in the elevator, but you ended up kicking everything from 3 to 11. Then you said, "pretty accurate, huh ladies?"
It's fun yes. But hard on the body. I woke up with her purse, socks and one of her shoes in my room. The other shoe was outside. What the fuck were we doing last night?
the only reason I'm still sleeping with him is to get the university's secure wifi password
His eyefucking isn't even normal eyefucking; it's eye anal.
But what if there are 6 people and they end up just pairing the off into 3 couples. Is it still an orgy?
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