you made cement angels. it was a great sight.
no, i dont want the owner to like me bc i dedazzled my vagina
There are at least 3.6 billion human cocks in this world. Get some. Get as many as humanly possible. Literally. Do it. 1-2-3 go!
You better of fucked him last night or do it now because he is buying all the roommates McDonald's.
theres a new barista at starbuck holy fuck she's hot
i want to face-plant into her vagina
And I kind of want to stare at skinny jonah hill like a weird zoo exhibit lol.
Why are there chunks of your hair in everyones pocket?
I decided to mark my territory.
He's basically me if I was an 8-yr-old boy. It's like looking into a pudgy terrifying mirror
Just had an epiphany about how to drink more effectively in the shower. While walking across campus carrying a Franzia bag like Santa
do i respond to the booty call for the guy with the bigger dick or the one who has the gourmet coffee i like so much? at this point i'm leading toward the coffee
He woke up & asked where his pants were then asked where he was then asked who I was. Been married 20 yrs. He was drunkest ever.
Go have fun. I'm gonna go shower off the regret.
Would I do it again? Probably not but still,I don't regret a single ratchet thing I've done in college.
No ive been in the mountains getting high and baking cookies with a 4 year old
Bug bite on my vagina. I think we need to stop this 'sex in awesome places campaign.'
Randomize
