Done. Eyebrows are waxed, entire body shaved
Coming down off exstacy at a church event. Resisting the urge to dance to the church hymns.
Ya know, I lied. I wouldn't mess with him. Not because of the crazy/rehab issues... but because he wears tank-tops.
he said i looked like a lion with slutty lingerie on .
he made a bald eagle out of coke lines
It was a legit night tell he threw a snowball in the bar, thats when I knew it was time to go to the next bar.
I beat my mom's friend's boyfriend in a vodka chugging competition. Our generation FTW.
Best compliment ever: Being told that you really understand sex by a professional. After she gave you a HANDJOB.
only i would grind with someone to harp music at a gay wedding
I think my body is a cloud. This mixture of things is heavenly. Dare was wrong, drugs are awesome.
I put ketchup in a girls hair last night. I need a sorry balloon
Sex obviously provides more sustenance than oatmeal.
He didn't call me beautiful but he came in less than five minutes so same thing, right?
You know what else? He didn't even get to see my butt. And my butt is really cute. Car sex is awful.
My vagina cried when he left. I think she's about to be at war with my self respect.
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