He uses pillows to masturbate.
I told him that all frat guys do it... it was that easy to get him to go down on me.
she complimented my bra when we were hooking up. this lesbian thing has its upsides
i mean, we fucked on the futon in the garage where his band practices. pretty sure im now obligated to like his band on facebook.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
VODKA 4LOKO BEER NOT IN THE CLEAR
I just passed a drug test. I want to shout that from the top of a mountain. Can we have beers on the top of a mountain?
I dunno. Last time I went there I had got sexually propositioned by a Belgian prince.
he kept saying that we were in ian's fun time place and then continued to act like a dinosaur.
I have managed to reach the 'after meth poster look' before lunch here...
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
This guy on Hoarders just said "we're all about 4 or 5 decisions away from shitting in a bucket". True dat
Sad realization: so long as I use this sleep apnea machine, I will never be the little spoon!
I was all, oh. I've had tattoos and broken a limb. Waxing my lady parts will be a cake walk. I was wrong.
Hey, remember that time a week ago when we walk-of-shamed literally down the Vegas Strip at 8:45am and I had one broken heel?
He has a syndrome called asshole. And it flares up 24/7.
The party pretty much ended once she shit on the couch
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