if you're gona send my txt to that site at least change my area code plz
I don't know where I am, but I'm drinkin & I like these people
she refuses to pay for the plan b and so do i. it's the most dangerous game of chicken i've ever been involved in. but i have my pride.
I wont be hard to find. Im wearing a darth vader mask and I have a megaphone.
Yeah I had to push her down the hallway to the hotel room in a luggage carrier. The guy at the desk told me goodluck
And dont forget my 23rd birthday where with no underwear i crawled through the cage of the police car. Dont get drunk be fore you get drunk.
I think it says something about my life when I start picking up girls while im in rehab. And I don't think it's good.
He took a girl home tonight that he was trying to sell a fridge to. She wanted a fridge and got his dick. He's got a talent.
i officially have over $300 in my bank account. that's a year's worth of chipotle.
There is a high possibility I will pass out with my hand in a bag of Doritos
He put those pics of him with those girls on facebook and tagged his wife in them
Tequila 1 marriage 0
I hope you get a lego stuck in your dickhole
I slid a quarter down a drunk man's butt crack last night. Qdoba gets rowdy
You both snapchatted me that. Like, I just got a double dose of penis pastry.
Oh, do you remember telling everyone you were with that your vagina was angry last night?
Randomize
