my summer class's final was canceled bc it interfered with the world cup. he is giving us all A's on it. I love europe
I JUST WANT TO WATCH PORN BUT THE CAT IS JUST SITTING HERE LICKING HIS BALLS. I CAN'T DO IT.
Either this is the best sandwich I've ever had, or my stomach is just relieved to have something in it that's not Red Bull or semen.
They were greeting people getting off the 48 with green beers and cheers. The one day I decide not to take the bus home...
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
traded hat for shot of whiskey. lovah yo life. only ADVENTURE NOW. OH GOD IT WENT TO CAPS LOCK
he told me he didn't know whether he was gonna puke, pass out, or cum. i don't know if i should be flattered or offended.
Well for starters the people who just made my burger at the grab and go just told me to "hang in there"
Hon, I found you crying into a bathrobe in the back of a closet with a broken shoerack.
I didnt say frisky time, just alone time, to chat, or watch a show, or stare into one anothers eyes, or souls, or asses, whatever you straight people do
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Something about Sunday night screams phone sex
I'm literally taking a shit naked holding a bottle of wine.
We popped the air mattress last night via sex and we just kept going but it feels like I have a bruise on every vertebrae
My mom just asked if I've gotten any girls pregnant how is your day going
he just got here with a handle of tequila and box of condoms. looks like i'll be spending the weekend in bed
We have ur drink. Mom passed out in the bathroom. I'm goin to the other bathroom. Bs at the top of the stairs on way outside.
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