I'm cheating on the girl I'm cheating on my girlfriend with
My dignity? Collapsing on itself like a dying star.
four guys that i have slept with have come into my job today. FOUR. i feel like it's like bring your sex partners to work day.
Hey got that picture this morning. 1. clean your room 2.what happened to your nail? and 3. your penis is amazing,.
I think i blacked out...but i remember licking your teeth
oh god my hair smells like rotten vegetables, sweat, and tequila. I wanna party with your neighbors every night.
I swear that when we jog in the morning I can hear it slap between his thighs
Then you bent down and whispered, "excuse me mr. Stair, could you please stop moving?"
She got drunk on the air plane and pretended to be an elephant for an hour...Atleast the kid behind us enjoyed it.
The friend zone. He put me in the friend zone. But said he still wants me to suck his dick. I'm in the dick sucking friend zone and I want to die.
I'm just gonna eat nachos and wine fruit forever.
Sext: Bring me pancakes from the midnight breakfast gathering please
I think if you have sex on the couch it will psychologically damage it.
Holy shit, just saw a girl in the library smoking a bong disguised as a calculator
only I would find a long lost relative through a craigslist casual encounters ad
Randomize
