she just sneezed while going down on me. is it rude for me to ask her to do it again?
do you think they make care bear costumes for cats?
Could guys at least pretend I require some amount of money to be spent before I randomly go down on them?
His appology was" look at it this way, at least you'll give better head without those teeth.'
I got a Luke Skywalker costume so I can go do battle with the homeless guy who plays the fiddle dressed as Darth Vader downtown.
I've decided I'm either going to ease him into this breakup by having a threesome with him and the girl I'm leaving him for, or be brutal and fuck his room mate. it depends how nice he is tonight.
I can't wait to hear about your drunken cab ride to planned parenthood at 2pm
Last night I woke up and the national rep of his frat was sucking my toe.
In honor of Sarah Palin's bday I suggest we watch Nailing Palin
My mom wants to know what to send you in a care package. She used cat emojis, so you know it's serious
I am thinking about buying a decorative chest for all our sex stuff....
Haha just talked to the dude you bit on Thursday. He has been growing a beard to hide the bruising....
Have you ever realized how weird it is to think that you've fucked someone and don't know what their handwriting looks like?
He's the first boyfriend I wouldn't cheat on. This is a really big deal for me
eating pizza to get the taste of dick out my mouth wby
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