the chick doesn't look like she's put anything in her mouth for weeks other than his dick.
The Worst (noun)- 1. Getting up at 6am after a night of drinking. 2. Wearing a Peter Rabbit costume.
living well may be the best revenge, but it doesn't hurt that my exhusband is now dating a BEAST.
i dont know why he would complain when i touch him there.
Who spends 33 dollars at Taco Bell and lives???
how the hell did this chicken wing end up in my cast?!
Hey. Me and my buddy are drunk. you wanna give us tattoos of the hawaiian punch guy we shall pay very well. Seriously dude. no bull shit.
He made me cum 7 times AND I nearly drowned him during that 69 in the back of a ford focus. Yeah I should get my gynocologist.
Thanks to you and Ketel One I now have a court summons with the actual word "frolicking" on it.
you showed up at my door at 3am, handed me a bag of cold chicken nuggets and said "lead me to the non-irish Siobhans," do YOU think you were tripping?
I have the relationship skills of Miley Cyrus and I could've said this was a bad idea
Maybe she'll change her mind but the "go fuck yourself" doesn't seem promising
Hey, sorry for threatening to teabag your mom to death last night
It's the third day of class and I got told I smell like a distillery.
They're doing CPR to someone in the middle of Victoria's Secret. Way to block the undies, damnit!
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