She had hickeys... what's up with that?? HAHAHA
I have no memory of puking on someone. Was he cute?
does dane cook know its not 2004 and that hes no longer relevant?
I'm pretty sure there is a country song about this exact situation
I spent all day at the mall with her, then she made me actually watch a walk to remember then decided to tell me she was on her period. This one is either really crafty or I am really desperate.
I'm gonna make this happen. You think it would be too forward to text him my room number with turn by turn directions straight to my crotch?
Long labias. Talking about. Too drunk to explain. Tomorrow.
So not only did you shoot down my invitation and prob walked past my house but now ur excluding me from a wet t shirt contest which btw i totally would have won
the campus cop used the word depravity in our citation.
She's using our floating beer pong table as an air mattress to sleep on.
It's a hurricane, not a zombie apocalypse. WHY DID YOU BUY SHOTGUNS?!?!
Smoking a bowl and ordering Dominos, you want in on either, both, or none?
Dicks are not precious.
I knew it was all downhill from there when the straight vodka I was drinking tasted like water.
Turns out my GF and my FWB have a mutual friend. Yada yada yada, I need to crash on your couch
Randomize