don't get me wrong, i like my boss a lot, but not enough to not bang his daughter
thus making me awesome and them whores
Let's just be mature adults about last night and never speak of it again.
another holiday season passes without receiving a dick in a box, where did i go wrong in life?
These Dirty People Haven’t Told Their SO About Their Kinky Fetish
He keeps asking where i got my clothes and accessories. i'm not sure if he wants to fuck me, or go shopping.
My valentine's day: watching The Notebook, and porn, eating chocolate, and ice cream. All while jacking off.
Wow... you've managed to cover all of the sad girl stereotypes that exist.
You ordered a "mcblizzard" and yelled @ the worker for false advertisement because she didn't flip your "mcblizzard" upsidedown. You wanted it free. I'd say mcdonalds daytime workers need to be trained in dealing with daytime drunks too. She didn't know what to do.
So i closed my laptop as i started to fall off my bed and then i caught myself and realized that moment of catching myself is the difference between tuesday and friday.
my shower just felt like jesus cried on me. like he shed tears just for my shower.
This is Why People Stop Sex Halfway Through
Dude I broke my bong in half this morning. I kicked it as I was jerking off. I would never hide anything from you.
Get caught with marijuana. Cop takes piece. Buy new bong. Circle of fun.
Oh god. It's like a broken faucet. My guts sound like a bilge pump clogged with golf balls and cake frosting.
so she gave me back a bag of clothing, had some boxers in it...they werent mine.... well that sums up 5 years of my life
yeah I had to wear a fucking diaper from work home so I didn't get the shitty squirts all over my cars seats it was fucked
I just woke and boke and made apple pancakes. I'm kicking Monday in the dick.