The guy asked if i had a problem w/set schedules
There were 3 chicks in my bed I didn't know when I got home. Now I know all of them. Biblically.
I just used Master P to describe what sound the letter U makes to my daughter...
It was like my butthole was peeing. Felt comforting yet not fulfilling.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Helping a hot freshman girl move in = 2 hours of my life One bottle of cheap vodkas = $10 Watching her do the walk a shame on her first morning away from home = Priceless
let me put it this way. im never saying "join in or get out" again unless i know whos in the room.
I woke up naked on the bathroom floor. the tile grout marks on my boobs hurt, i mananged to use a roll toilet paper as a pillow. never again. did we eat salad?
We found her in the fireplace eating dog biscuits.
I have glow sticks stuck to my boobs and a missed call from the 911. I'd say last night was a success.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
She was a little hefty, so I turned on the strobe light in our room. Everything looks better with a strobe light.
Beans, may the odds of a nip slip and drunken make out session be ever in your favor
I find it weird that you'll let me in your vagina, but not your house
I just found a To Do list on the table, written by me last night, that just says "1. Go downstairs. 2. Get Pickles. 3. Laptop"
Drink. Fuck. Waffle House. Repeat.
I just threw up on the way to class. Legit, on the sidewalk by psych building.
THAT WAS YOU? Psych prof just pointed out the window and said "that kids, is why you don't pregame before class"
Randomize