Texts From Last Night · Random Texts

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(425): View more from Washington

OKAY SO WHENEVER I SEE AN UGLY COUPLE I ALWAYS WONDER WHAT THEY SAY TO EACH OTHER IN BED. creepy?

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(520): View more from Arizona

If I were a boy, I'd name my penis Reptar.

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(773): View more from Illinois

Let's start a violent farting gang. We can do walkbys.

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(803): View more from South Carolina

you wouldnt answer to anything but devil's advocate all night.

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(410): View more from Maryland

I almost punched the night nurse in her face. I woke up and she was standing over me.

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(724): View more from Pennsylvania

You think posting ushers "let it burn" video on his fb page is in bad taste? haha

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(+61): View more from Australia

Dude, I checked into a cathedral... I thought it was a joke, until I found a candle and a whole bunch of coins in my purse

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(+61): View more from Australia

I'n not even sure we went out, but I know we broke into a cemetery.

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(305): View more from Florida

Its the damn oven. I think it wants to eat me.

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