I find it ironic that homeless people are so good in bed
margarita wednesday is really going to dip into new year's eve thursday
If she asks the cat was vomiting before I fed it fried calamari
My three rules on what I'm wearing tonight. Something short, something see through, and something i had sex in.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Also, my phone autocorrects ENABLER to all caps. I think I drunk text the word too often.
Serious question...Is it possible to get a DUI on a kayak?
If there is a ladylike way to throw up in your favorite toilet, I just did it.
Drunk me obviously wants to fuck up my life
It's like I have an arch nemesis, and it's me
I was Jaeger weird. I was rolling on the floor pretending to be an Olympic gymnast and my name was Gina
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
He took a picture of me to show his boss why he was late...Is that a compliment or not?
Just burnt my tongue. Not sure if it will help or hurt giving blow jobs
He called me 'pal' while complimenting how well I took his load on my face. I've officially been fuckbuddy-zoned.
I got a lap dance in honor of your birthday last night.
Thank you.
theres a video...
oh god.
I was doing good, then they gave me free shots
I don't know why this person would ask for help. It sounds pretty OK to me. Also, I'd steal those bagpipes.
Randomize