i just realized that we are the poor version of bethenny and jill from real housewives... and I'm jill. this is a 6.5 on the depressing scale
at least we're not in new jersey
I think I'd remember a dick in my mouth
So the next morning, she had to tell her kids we were moving furniture around all night.
oh but the power of the cock will take you to places you never been..i flew to hawaii once to sleep witha chick
Friends dont let friends get hit with a flaming baton without warning
I love you like a cupcake loves an overweight child, very similar to the mannerisms of a whole cake but personal, and minus the commitment issues, plus just the right amount of icing; not to mention the convenience of mobility, and only a smidgen of the guilt😘
I think if it were a part of everyone's daily routine, the world would be happier. International Finger Yourself While Bathing Day.
He stood up, threw the bag of bud between me and Tory, yelled "Fight" and then ran upstairs for the pizza
By the time the opening band finished, she was already slurring, coming on to the gay couple next to us, and waving her panties in the air.
Sneezing cum all over the table was not the highlight of the family reunion if that tells you anything
do me a favor, I need this weekend off so can you work your magic and blow my boss again?
I want to sit on top of her nipple mountains and reenact the Ricola commercial.
I DONT WANT YOUR DICK. I WANT BRUNCH.
If she didn't block me, she would have known that I sneezed on her toothbrush.
so my dads pretending to use the snow blower and theres absolutley no snow one the ground.... someone should really lock our liqour cabinet
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