I admire a woman who can maintain dignity while puking after too much whiskey
We put her face under a blacklight.....it looked like fireworks
Apparently "he pulled out..mostly" is not a valid reason for thinking there's no way i can be pregnant to the nurses at the student health center.
I'm watching him slurp a whole mango out of her hand. It's disturbingly arousing.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Rule of thumb; if you ask me if my tits are fake you will not get to touch them.
Welp last night I made out with the guy who slices my deli meat at publix. I'm sure there's a joke there but I'm too hungover to find it. Go noles.
Tbh I fell asleep cuddling a bag of Brazilian nuts. Franzia never dissappoints me
I lost my favorite bra in his hotel room. Is it bad that that's the only reason I hope he texts me tomorrow?
Normally, it will inspire me to work. Today, it's inspiring me to masturbate.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
In my top drawer right now, there are see's chocolates, condoms, weed, and my vibrator. One way or another, this is going to be a good night
Long fucking story. But hey I got an orgasm and breakfast so I'm winning.
About to wash down a xan with an iced pumpkin spiced latte from starbs and I feel like I've never lived up to my stereotype so much at one time
I just fanned myself with my wet toothbrush to dry my mascara. Wtf
Yeahh. im on the phone with him drunk. he told me he found a pigeon in a cardboard box and named it quincy...
Lately I've been very attracted to Kevin Jonas because he's like...less hot than Joe, but he's this healthy mix of both Joe and Nick. It looks like he's finally growing into himself.
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