Dude she has a bf and shes on lockdown more than Nelson Mandela in 95
So after i got done, she went over and got out her gecko, I felt like I was in an X rated geiko commercial.
You know, I really only think drinking is a problem if you're not good at it.
can you buy anything in the cafeteria for less than $2? I spent the last of my laundry money on a chia pet
The required reading for this week is a paper about birds called great tits. Let's see my TA keep a straight face through this discussion.
Ok cool. Ill pick up liquor because, well let's be honest, we don't need an excuse anymore.
ever have one of those nights where you feel like you should leave the house with your insurance card? that is tonight, my friend.
Just say its a British thing. They wont know Its not. And if they say you're not British, proposition them for a post-sex game of cricket.
They broke our car window and then wrote "great night" on the next
There is an alarming amount of urine in here.
They are the perfect team. One always has weed, the other always has cigarettes. They're like the Batman and Robin of drugs
I told my grandmother all I want is a nice guy who likes to be tied up.
Went to take a shower. Brought my wine, forgot my towel.
Just ignore the penis. It's won't bother you. I promise.
She climbed in my window blew me and left. She's in my phone as the blow job fairy
Randomize
