Tell him ill love him long time
I'll assure him of it
I texted him about a book we both like. I was expecting a "ya great book... let's bone" response. It didn't work
there were more penises there than on chat roulette
she added emergen-c to the bong-water bro, brilliant.
I just watched a guy pee from a second floor window onto the line of 100 people waiting to get in.
Come over. Drunk tacos.
That isn't even a sentence.
I kept the important parts.
Guess what I'm doing tonight? Tacos and strip chess.
You left your underwear in a sandwich bag on my kitchen counter.
I have the WORST cramps EVER. I think this is gods way of saying 'you're welcome, last warning. stop being a slut.'
I heard them banging and it sounded like he was trying to stuff a fucking coconut into her
The neighbor just yelled bring me back that big red alien penis.
The girl neighbor.
I left the brick of cheese in your car! Keep it at Moderate Temp! It's my precious!
yeah we're all naked, and I think we just shaved Chad.
I know her cup size but not her name....
Goat in kitchen.....explanation?....
Randomize
