love how google fills in search terms for you, today for example, i ran a query for "why do girls get t"
and google finished it w/ "ramp stamps."
I felt less weird knowing others had searched this before me.
i just saw her new tattoo, how much more trashy can you get than having "taste the rainbow" on your body for the rest of your life?
I just noticed that when I sneeze...my nipples get hard.
I didnt believe in cockblocking untill my roomate brought home that.
You said "It's ok guys, I know I'm not really a turtle" and then tried walking on the lake.
Woke up next to my bed in a pile of skittles, sleeping on a pair of sweatpants. I can't believe the girl didn't stick around..
The kid I'm babysitting just asked if I had a boyfriend. WHY IS A FOUR YEAR OLD MAKING ME FEEL BAD ABOUT MY LIFE
i havent blinked in 235 seconds. now 247. now 258. 263. 267. 271. i also have been gifted with theability to both type and count and not blink. 293 so magical
we tried to exchange flip flops in the parking lot and fell over then army crawled home
Yeah. I asked if there was a finger in my ass at some point or if I had a weird dream. So far he hasn't responded
I DMed the cop that arrested me to come unlock my keys out if my car today
He said I taste like cake. Like funfetti. So I feel like if he doesn't come back for that he's just dumb
the fact that I always have. bottle of tequila in my purse is not helping my current sitch
I hate being on my period . Did you know that by the time I'm 30 I would've wasted 1,176 days of my life I could've had sex but couldn't bc I was on my period.
Southwest doesn't have zingzang bloody Mary mix. I'm gonna file a complaint with the FAA
Randomize
