i just borrowed 5 dollars from my eight year old sister. i'm at a new low
Aren't I supposed to sit on your face?
My relationship with VH1 is so bittersweet
Sorry I tried to blow your roommate in your room. I felt more at home there.
i mad aa ber float. budweiser nd ice creem. it amzig.
Ok that kid was ether gay or 12 with a beard.
My teacher just let our class out 30 minutes early, its a 50 minute class. He said the only thing we had to do was get fucked up tonight and have stories about it on Monday.
Have you picked out a bathroom stall in which to fuck? Since you've got all this free time before her plane lands...
Thanks for the Beyonce article. In other news, I just passed a man with the state of Florida tattooed on his face.
You said "this is only my eighth drink" with like 6 separate drinks
Last year you twerked on my Christmas tree and threw up all over the bathroom...in front of my parents. We should probably keep power hour to ONLY an hour this year
I'm really glad I had vomit on my sweater when I met his sister.
Well, my mom found the ball gag and whip. Looks like I'm never going home again.
i just passed i guy i once let listen to me masterbate on the phone...nyc is not big enough
I mean she did throw a tantrum because you wouldn't let her suck your dick
Randomize
