also: i found my "nug jug", actually the baby did, but either way it got returned to its rightful owner
Chipotle chips and wine for breakfast. Its def game day
you were wandering around the street for like an hour singing "nothing but socks on"..an original you wrote after the 12th shot i believe
My afternoon will now be spent googling genital warts. I think my life is over.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
It's because you were crossfaded. And because drinks were 3 dollars. And because they accepted credit cards.
Woke up with my face in a bowl of cereal. This is tequila's way of saying fuck you.
So apparently I threw a potted plant at a clown last night and told him to get his life together.
Im officially canceling McCormick Monday. I got a raise.
Sooo grey goose Tuesday?????
It's cool dude. The dank is in the form of premade smores with honey grahm crackers, marshmallow cream and 420 brand choc. bars. NV weed laws have nothing on me.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
We peed on campus in the middle of the tailgate and then hit on a married cop that asked you to stop touching him
She's hot and all. It's just I don't want to become Eskimo brothers with my sister
Well I mean I HAD done a pretty good job of not pooping myself through the years
I would fuck him just for his dog
I’ve cut back on drinking and now my body can’t fight off all the bad germs without the alcohol. That’s why I keep getting sick
only i would get cock blocked by a cop
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