I've been congratulating people on facebook about their forthcoming pregnancies. I can't wait to see how this plays out
i wish i was a boy too so i knew what a blow job felt like
i've never heard her scream louder than when the koreans scored. what am i lacking in bed?
im probably shirtless right now with a bottle of jack watching horton hears a who. this is a judgement free zone.
Well, if he didn't want to get caught mid-gay experience by his girlfriend, he shouldn't have pushed so hard to do MDMA with me.
You might have crossed the line by jerking off while she was in the bathroom taking a prego test. Just saying
Ok spinning in the opposite direction thatg the room was spinning was the worst advice ever
If it's up to me, I'll already have my pants on and walking out before he gets soft afterward.
How do you say happy birthday to someone you fuck occasionally that almost got you arrested? Like what do I text.
He just showed up on my porch naked with just a blanket and a trash bag
Now when you said you'd never sleep with me, did you really mean never on a Monday or never without handcuffs or a blindfold or never on a airplane or never without lots of booze? Cus never is a pretty strong word.
I just woke up hand cuffed to the bar and shirtless, so yeah I think I need you to come get me.
The tequila monkeys have a drum solo in my skull right now. I can't imagine Emily feels better.
My mom heard me having sex with my boyfriend but thought it was the neighbors. She commented on how quick it was. I just nodded and changed the subject
Try sleeping with him.
Why is it that all my gay friends have that solution...
Cuz you will have an answer or have sex.
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